Women with grey hair often discounted in the workplace
Age catches up to us all, but in the workplace, there remains a big difference in how men with grey hair are treated compared to women with grey hair.
As the modern workplace makes an effort to be more inclusive and remove stigma, many perceived barriers have been overcome. However, an unspoken barrier that deserves more concentration is the imbalances in the age between men and women.
In the workplace, there is an expectation for women to dye their hair when it begins to go grey. If women choose not to dye their hair, this can impact perceptions of them as a leader, making
women more vulnerable to “ageism.”
According to the World Health Organisation (WHO), ageism refers to the stereotypes, prejudice and discrimination towards others or oneself based on age. Despite all the progress, ageism is still rife in the workplace, especially with women as targets.
For example, in January, a Scottish woman lost a $5 million employment dispute with her company over her complaints that she was given a nickname by colleagues “Christine Lagarde” due to her grey hair. Lagarde is the president of the European Central Bank and has grey hair.
The 52-year-old Scottish woman took offence at the nickname and sued her company, claiming she was a victim of “a culture of sexism and ageism” and bullying by colleagues before she was made redundant.
However, Judge Bernice Elgot dismissed the claim and said that being nicknamed Christine Lagarde was “part of the irritation of day-to-day office life which occasionally occurs.”
While the Scottish legal case was likely correctly adjudicated, it presented a commonly felt bias in most workplaces.
People don’t talk about things like age and grey hair. The senior leadership teams often roll out plans for DEI (diversity, equity, and inclusion) mandates, but that’s often little more than platitudes.
They are very good at ticking boxes and taking public accolades for such initiatives. Yet I am often sceptical that real buy-in to inclusion is there.
George Clooney is an excellent example of the perceived differences in grey hair between men and women.
If a man like Clooney chooses to go grey, there is an element of bucking the trend. He’s putting himself out there. He became more visible. There’s no judgement on a man going grey. Clooney is often called a ‘silver fox’ because going grey on a man is distinguished.
But for women, the opposite happens. Rather than becoming more visible, they tend to become invisible. People will assume, or make comments, that a woman looks a lot older, which can be attached negative connotations.
Dyeing grey hair is a woman’s choice, not a judgement of women who choose to do this. But if women decide not to dye their grey hair, as with the story from Scotland, they risk getting harmful and sometimes hurtful comments.
Here are a few tips for dealing with ageism in the workplace.
1. Call it out.
As with any attempt at belittling or victimisation, women at the sharp end of the ageism stick should immediately call out that behaviour and explain to the other person why it can be hurtful.
The world needs women in places of responsibility, especially the workplace. So, it is essential that women – and anyone else who witnesses ageism – stand in their power and confront it. Don’t tolerate it.
2. Recognise boundaries
Office banter is one thing, but directly hurtful words can be another. To recognise the difference, a person has to know their boundaries for what’s acceptable.
Get better at recognising what you are prepared to put up with and what you are not. Stereotypes infiltrate perceptions, and a culture of ageism can seriously impact a person’s chance for promotion. It’s essential to be firm about one’s boundaries here.
3. Enforce boundaries.
Like laws, boundaries without enforcement are worth less. If a workplace has a risk or even a tendency towards ageism, it is crucial to open a discussion with senior leadership about consequences before the situation arises.
Set boundaries and have the confidence to deliver on those boundaries. This solves two problems immediately: The first is hurtful behaviour, and the second is that you can be tough and will follow the rules in moments of stress. That’s an excellent signal to project for career progression.